☕ Introducing: Liberal Latte Lament™ ☕
Tired of candles that smell like sunshine and rainbows? Want something that captures the true essence of adulting in a world gone mad? Look no further than Liberal Latte Lament, the candle that will make your living room smell like a post-grad existential crisis.
👃 A Symphony of Scents:
Top Notes: The bitter aroma of burnt coffee beans, a reminder of that overpriced latte you bought to fuel your doomed job hunt.
Heart Notes: A subtle hint of student loan debt, like the lingering smell of ramen noodles cooked in a dorm room microwave.
Base Notes: The crushing weight of reality, a complex blend of disillusionment, regret, and the faint whiff of a dream deferred.
🔥 Why Choose Liberal Latte Lament?
Perfect for: Overeducated underachievers, armchair activists, and anyone who's ever cried while listening to a Joni Mitchell song.
Not for: Optimists, people with stable jobs, or anyone who actually enjoys the taste of pumpkin spice.
Caution: May cause uncontrollable urges to rant about capitalism, write angry poetry, or binge-watch documentaries about the decline of Western civilization.
🕯️ Light It Up!
Embrace the sweet sorrow of adulthood with Liberal Latte Lament, the candle that will make your home smell like a philosophy department on a rainy day. Get yours today and let the bitter scent of reality waft through your soul!
.: Materials: 100% natural soy wax blend, 100% cotton wick and a glass jar
.: Compliant with ASTM safety standards
.: One size: 2.8″ × 3.5" (7.1cm × 8.9cm)
.: Burning time: 50-60 hours
.: Glossy permanent adhesive label
.: Choose from nine different aromatic scents
.: Assembled in the USA from globally sourced parts
.: Please note: All scents have the same wax color
